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Grammar Girl : How Freefpon to Write Dialogue :: Quick and Dirty Tips ™
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wait wat were we doing again
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yufool
Is grammar girl a lesbo?
nerd fight nose picker
OMG!!!!! I love this!!!! It helped my 19 year old mom make a great story!!!! Now i can make great stories even though im only 9!!!!
Snow White
that sounds good to me
cincederlla carrot woman
hey! lets go fishing!!!! the robber pooped on the mexican elephant
Mrs.NOKA
I teach for a job and this is the worst to teach kids. As soon as i read it I automaticaly took it off the lesson plan.
mrs .smith
this was very hard to understand !not for kids at all
Your Mom
Poop on your chest
hat
this was pretty confusing i couldnt really understand it
benk
omg this is the best in the world wooooohhhhoooo
Josie
I loved this it was the best article. I have read all day.
Carrie
Can you do one that actually tells how to write dialogue instead of talks about something else they don't explain very well?
azemeraw
i have been informed about dialogue.so, please add any more conversation and how to write it.
hannah
i want it to be aboutemphsizing on the benefit of combine of studies
hannah
i want it to be aboutemphsizing on the benefit of combine of studies
Anju
please show an example of converation in the form of greeting
simone
This article was misleading. It's not about how to write dialogue, it's about parallel structure and even then I'm not sure it makes any sense. I'm more confused than before I read it only now I have a headache.
Kelly
I am very confused by this article. I was an English major in college, and this is not manner in which I was taught to write.
Someone please explain to me why this sentence is grammatically correct.
“You shouldn’t have!” said Squiggly, and grabbed the box of chocolates.
Should it not be:
"You shouldn't have!" said Squiggly, and HE grabbed the box of chocolates.
or
"You shouldn't have!" Squiggly said and grabbed the box of chocolates.
I also do not understand this example:
Fenster crawled slowly and steadily, AND won the race.
Should it not be:
Fenster crawled slowly and steadily, and HE won the race.
or
Fenster crawel slowly and steadily and won the race.
Why are commas being used in these two examples? This appears to be incorrect comma usage.
Neal Whitman
Julie:
I agree; putting a comma whenever you intend for there to be a pause would get ridiculous. (Imagine if William Shatner did that!)
However, there is some room for discretion, even when you're just coordinating verb phrases and not entire clauses. With longer verb phrases, I will use a comma to help the reader see the division between them. And with these verb phrases involving fronted quotations, the usual style I've seen is to use a comma, probably because the intonation of this kind of verb phrase is different from other verb phrases.
Julie
Neil,
You said you don't have much to say about the comma: "With our without one is fine, depending on how much of an intonation break seems natural." But our rules for commas have to do with the structure of the sentence, not when we choose to break in intonation, correct? As a high school English teacher, I hate when students say, "I thought you were supposed to put a comma wherever you take a breath." I see no valid reason to put a comma before "and" in the following: “You shouldn’t have!” said Squiggly, and grabbed the box of chocolates. "Said" and "grabbed" are both verbs that Squiggly did; they should be part of a compound predicate which would not necessitate a comma.
Darla-Jean Weatherford
SilenceIsGolden: Except that I am among the guilty who used to think the comma "sliced" the two parts of the sentence apart from each other rather than "spliced" them together. I had created a sense that was wrong but worked for me—my understanding of an eggcorn—rather than just using the wrong word—a malapropism. I was probably in college before I sorted it out and heard the "p" in "splice."
Neal Whitman
Wow, that comment went right up! I'll try redoing the other one.
What I wrote was that I had checked back for questions, and had been busy with a response that was too big for the comments here. Instead, I've put it on the Literal-Minded blog. I won't put the link, to minimize the chances of this comment getting spammed.
Neal Whitman
Looks like my comment from last night (regarding Bill Walsh's response) is still under review. Maybe this one will fare better.
Wendy: Your rephrasing is fine if the grabbing came before the squealing. I envisioned the squealing coming before the grabbing.
Publius, SilenceIsGolden: I don't have much to say about the comma. With our without one is fine, depending on how much of an intonation break seems natural.
SilenceIsGolden
@ Darla-Jean -- Comma *slice* is a malapropisms (non-sensical), not an eggcorn (new meaning).
How odd that Neal Whitman never bothered to come by again to check if there were any questions to his article.
Darla-Jean Weatherford
It's comma splice: using a comma to "splice" two clauses together, just as we might use tape to splice two pieces of paper together (or, in the days of magnetic recording tapes, two ends of tape). "Comma slice" is surely an eggcorn.
Andy
Is it comma splice or slice? are those two different things? I just woke up.
Publius
Perhaps comma splice is an incorrect term, but when you place a comma in front of a conjunction, you are implying what follows is independent. I knew the sentence itself was not a fragment, but the last half is not independent. @SilenceIsGolden probably is on the right track - omit the comma.
SilenceIsGolden
I also have a problem with the comma in the very first example, but @ Publius - I don't think this is a case of comma slice, as there are no two complete sentences.
In fact, it's only one sentence with two verbs ("said" and "grabbed") that are connected with the conjunction "and."
Can somebody please explain why there should be a comma?
Bill Walsh
"Damn," he said, and repeated.
Does that sentence leaving you asking "What in the world did he repeat?" then you have a point. If not, well, he didn't both say-you-shouldn't-have and grab-the-box-of-chocolates-you-shouldn't-have.
Publius
“You shouldn’t have!” said Squiggly, and grabbed the box of chocolates.
That sure looks like a comma slice to me. "Grabbed the box" is not an independent clause. Please explain.
Wendy
Why not write: Squiggley squealed with glee when he grabbed the box of chocolates?
I say this because Squiggley squealed with glee as a result of grabbing the box of chocolates.
Amy
My comment, besides this is always a great podcast, is about quotation fronting; especially when you encounter this writing technique reading out-loud. My issue is when reading a sentence like: "This is great", he said sarcastically - the sentence can mean many different things based on the inflection of the reader. But with quotation fronting that inflection is not known until after the sentence is read. As someone who enjoys reading out-loud I always feel a "gotcha" moment when I read a sentence only to find out the speaker said it with an emotion I did (or did not) use.
Thanks!
Amy